Vegetarians and Summertime BBQs

With the warm weather here, everyone's firing up the grill, and though there are endless vegetarian food options, being a vegetarian at a non-vegetarian BBQ can be difficult. So how does a vegetarian cope in this situations? For me, meat-centered BBQs are where I draw the line. This is probably not the most helpful piece of advice, and I realize that it’s not ALWAYS possible to avoid such event, but that's what works for me. I also realize the point as vegetarians/vegans is not to isolate ourselves in this crazy non-vegan world, but BBQs are really tough for me. It's not like having dinner across the table with a non-vegetarian, because it’s a little easier to avoid looking at what they’re putting on their fork or in their mouth. But BBQs are totally different. First, there’s the smell.

Unfortunately, once summer begins, it’s not like I can avoid BBQs completely, because if I’m in my backyard on any given weekend (and sometimes during the week), someone’s grilling the bodies of animals. I can’t escape the smell of burning flesh. I can’t escape the smoke that rises from that burnt flesh. It’s horrible, and it’s offensive. Even if I come inside my house, because of the position of my neighbor’s grill on their patio, I have to close all the windows or it just wafts into my kitchen and living room and dining room. Not pleasant.

Ironically, I was just talking to that particular neighbor about another neighbor who tends to play music really loudly outside, and my neighbor said, “Ya know – when I’m outside, I want to enjoy the quiet of my own yard. Not everyone wants to hear someone else’s music.” And, oh wasn’t I tempted to make the same point about the smells I have to endure from their yard. I mean – what’s the difference? There’s no difference.

Interestingly, I don’t know if you’ve read anything about what’s happening in some places in India, particularly in Mumbai, where there is a growing trend for neighborhood societies to uphold strict vegetarian-only housing policies. People who create these communities and enforce this rule want to be surrounded by like-minded people, and the smell is one reason they really appreciate living in vegetarian-only housing, where there’s no meat anywhere – not even in the local restaurants for miles. I read one article where someone on the other side of the issue was complaining. He said: "It's just not fair. It's a monopoly by vegetarians. If you step out to eat, there's nothing for miles because everything around is vegetarian." Nothing around for miles - right. This issue is creating animosity, of course, but it’s a really interesting issue. My husband and I were gardening in our front yard the other day, and we packed up early because the neighbor across the street starting grilling animals, and it was just so offensive. So, I think this whole thing is a really interesting issue.

Anyway, that’s one of the reasons I don’t go to meat-centered BBQs. You can’t escape the smell, you can’t escape seeing the buckets of animal thighs, breasts, backs, and wings. That’s all you see. It’s like a horror movie. Now I’ve said this a million times, but I’ll say it again. I grew up eating this stuff. I grew up with a veil in front of my eyes that enabled me to grab the leg of an animal (detached from her body, of course) and sink my teeth into it. It wasn’t until the veil was lifted that I saw – and now see – things differently.

And then there’s just how surreal it all is: everyone focused on those body parts. Everyone oooohing and ahhhhing over the burned flesh. Oohing and aaahing over those bodies just isn’t my idea of a good time.

So, even though I draw the line at BBQs, that doesn’t mean you have to or want to. I realize there are times when you find yourself at a meat-based BBQ or you can’t get out of the invitation or you want to go to see friends or family. And there are things you to make sure you enjoy the food. The first suggestion is to bring food. But do make enough for everyone, because inevitably everyone will eat your fabulous food. (It never fails – if there is any public activity involving the food of a vegan and a meat-eater – the vegan food gets gobbled up by everyone – vegans and non-vegans alike.) So bring a fabulous dish to ensure you’ll eat – or you may be close enough with the host that you know he or she is planning on providing vegetarian food for the grill.

Next time, I'll offer a number of recipes and suggestions for such an occasion.